Okay so last week I'm on the bus. It's half past seven, it's Sunday evening and there are three fellow passengers with me. One's an old man, who's sat across from me and the other two consist of a mother and her pram ridden son. There's nothing in this set-up that could conceivably suggest that anything exciting is about to take place. The woman's on the phone, she's talking and then starts to becomes agitated. Now, I don't think I can really repeat in a public forum exactly what she said but here's a quick summary. She began to explain (in explicit detail by the way) how she was going to kill her ex-boyfriend , with a hammer, and then later take their son to his funeral and make him urinate in his fathers grave. Very nice I'm sure you'll agree.
This obviously appalled me, but what struck me afterwards was the anger of this women and her almost insistence on letting the bus know exactly how angry she was. I have no idea why, It was only myself and the old guy on the bus and he looked none too impressed either. I'd love to say this was an isolated incident but sadly that's not the case. Well, maybe it is, I haven't heard anyone threatening to kill someone then excrete on their grave, but there have been some other examples of shocking public behaviour. Three days ago for instance, two ladies, in their fifties may I add, shouting and fighting. It was about half past four on a Monday afternoon and there were more than a few children on the bus. This may not sound too bad, but it was. The bus driver pulled over and refused to drive on, until they vacated. They argued and fought as we drove off down the road.
Another hate filed bus ride came when a preacher decided to use the number 35 to Clapham as his church, in rush hour. As you may imagine this went down like a lead balloon. I don't want to get into any kind of discussion on religion. People have their own opinions and views and as far as I'm concerned that's fair enough. However, using a bus as a place to preach is pretty in your face (all be it fairly ingenious), but my 'beef' isn't really with this either. It was the reaction it produced, anger like I have almost never seen before in my life. I would imagine there will be people (myself included at the time) who would find the idea of a man preaching on a bus too intrusive, but why is that? If I was stood at the bus station for twenty minutes, which is approximately the same time as my journey that day, would this have been as infuriating? I'm guessing no.
Buses are obviously not to blame for the problems aboard, they are after all just vessels, but for some reason people do tend to act strangely on them. What I find equally as curious is that these types of events don't seem to happen on the tube, or at least not nearly as frequently. I used the tube for almost two years before moving to an area in South east London which required bus use and I didn't see one, fight, argument or threat on someones life. It could be said that this is most likely because tubes don't run all night. However, none of the above happened after the water shed. Does that conclusively mean that tubes are safer and better than buses? Of course not, I could have just been lucky, or unlucky depending your angle!
Buses for better or for worse tend to be more vocal places. You can use your phone, something which is restricted on both Trains and Tubes and also there is a massively diverse population. I honestly can't think of another situation where so many different people have the opportunity to meet in a completely neutral place. When you think about it, it's hardly surprising that occasionally there's a little hot headedness. I have sat on many a bus after work and felt my blood pressure rise. It maybe the guy behind me tapping his foot or the lady in front listening to her music too loudly, but for whatever reason, seemingly un-intrusive acts become grating as hell in the bus arena. Thankfully my passive irritableness has never flourished to full bus rage, however it affords me a least some sympathy to the more minor aggression related incidents, although not those involving hammers.
I'm aware this may sound like one long anti bus rant so I want to balance things up a little. I love the bus. I would use it any day over the tube, because frankly I prefer daylight. There's also at least a small chance of getting a seat in the morning, and well there's also the cost which is considerably lower. It is however an unfortunate inevitability that you will have to put up with a few muppets every so often. I'll leave you with this, use buses they are generally great. However if you are the hot blooded type, the next time you feel a bus related tantrum coming on, take a breath, enjoy the view and relax. What ever you do, don't become an angry bus person!
