So I've just spent the past six days in Dubai. In a nut-shell, for people who have never been, Dubai is hot, extravagant, rich and well let's be honest sandy. It was the first week-long holiday I've had in a few years and the reason for choosing Dubai was to visit a friend. As a result I spent the week living within an expat community. To a large extent the social community resembled closely that which I had left back in Blighty. However, with subtle differences. The most noticeable of these is that Dubai is a very large city, but it has a town-type feel. What I mean by this is that people seem to be less anonymous. Now this may not necessarily be a feature of Dubai itself but more of the expat community, although not having lived in either I can't be sure. What I can tell you is the environment I found myself in was one where people were close, the atmosphere was friendly and there was a solid sense of inclusion.
The purpose of this month's blog is not to discuss Dubai and the social difference between the clustered communities that exist there and those in London. It's to illustrate a point, and I promise you I do have one. Whilst away I witnessed a dispute which started, as so many arguments do, on a drunken night out. The original incident occurred in restaurant the day before my arrival, where the offending person made (apparently) a bit of a scene and verbally insulted a number of the establishment's staff and other clientele. From what I gather the restaurant in question markets themselves as a loud sociable venue, so unpleasant as these things are, they're probably fairly common place.
The repercussions for the offender were harsh, and were aided and exaggerated by the availability of technology.
As you may expect the following morning the offender issued a prompt apology via text message. It was ignored and with a medium such as text messaging silence can be deathly. This continued for a couple of days and after a number of failed attempts at communication Facebook was used to try and solidify the apology and appeal to those offended in an open forum.
One of the great things about Facebook and other similar sites is their availability to the masses. They provide 'The Average Joe' with the opportunity to spread their opinion to a vast range and number of people. This is why we love them. For the most part I tend to use Facebook as a way of providing friends with a high level commentary on my life. Well, that and a way to publicise the odd witty observations. I don't think I'm particularly unique.
In the case this week Facebook was used as a method to try and restore social equilibrium. It didn't work and instead highlighted a very, very visible way in which to vent frustration. The opportunity was not wasted and a number of fairly tame, but very visible, snide comments ensued.
In the circle of friends I have, Facebook isn't used as a bitching tool. That said I have made a number of foot-in-mouth comments which easily could have been misinterpreted and erupted in on-line arguments. Thankfully that hasn't happened, but more down to luck (and a high level of tolerance by my friends) than my own judgement. Sadly however, I have witnessed it amongst two people I know and it can get messy. If you take an average Facebook account holder and estimate that they have around one hundred contacts, if an on-line argument occurs between three people, comments could be visible to three hundred people! Now, given the offender in this case used Facebook as a way to apologise, abusing them to hundreds of people seemed somewhat harsh. More than that it highlights how cheaply someone's credibility can be put into question, with very little thought from the aggressor. Once upon a time if you had some 'beef' with someone you talked to them about it. Even the most active busy-body probably couldn't publicise their opinions to more than ten or so people using the traditional methods of slander, speech.
I've omitted both the name of the guilty and well the guilty (the aggressor and the offender) in this article, because frankly the process of 'misdemeanor followed by bollocking' is not a new one. It's old, very old. However, what it did make me realise was how easily someone can be socially isolated by the use of social media. Now personally I don't think that was what it was meant for. In truth I don't think either the offender or the aggressor this week appreciated how detrimental Facebook could be. But that's the problem. As Facebook users, we are encouraged to say what's on our minds, for better and for worse. As the use of social media becomes a more prominent part of our life style, as indeed it has over the past five or so years, I have absolutely no doubt that these type of incidents will become more frequent. There's a massive difference between online banter and online abuse; notably tone and context, which are easily misinterpreted.
Looking beyond the case above, posting abusive or inappropriate messages on Facebook can have far-reaching consequences. Posting an insult may seem harmless or even funny at the time, but you only have to look at sites such as Failbook or Lamebook to realise how horribly devastating they can be. I have family members on Facebook and a throw away comment from 'friends' could easily lead to a great deal of controversy. Just imagine, your old dear reading a post about a conquest from the previous night, left by a mate. Probably, she wouldn't be impressed and I dare say somewhat disappointed, all because of nothing more than a lack of thought from the poster. The misuses of social media are potentially endless but thankfully I think most people have the common sense to use them with at least a minimal degree of respect. However next time you post a throw away comment consider who could be reading, because not only does a derogatory comment leave a black mark on the recipient, but it also can say a lot about you too.
In the case this week Facebook was used as a method to try and restore social equilibrium. It didn't work and instead highlighted a very, very visible way in which to vent frustration. The opportunity was not wasted and a number of fairly tame, but very visible, snide comments ensued.
In the circle of friends I have, Facebook isn't used as a bitching tool. That said I have made a number of foot-in-mouth comments which easily could have been misinterpreted and erupted in on-line arguments. Thankfully that hasn't happened, but more down to luck (and a high level of tolerance by my friends) than my own judgement. Sadly however, I have witnessed it amongst two people I know and it can get messy. If you take an average Facebook account holder and estimate that they have around one hundred contacts, if an on-line argument occurs between three people, comments could be visible to three hundred people! Now, given the offender in this case used Facebook as a way to apologise, abusing them to hundreds of people seemed somewhat harsh. More than that it highlights how cheaply someone's credibility can be put into question, with very little thought from the aggressor. Once upon a time if you had some 'beef' with someone you talked to them about it. Even the most active busy-body probably couldn't publicise their opinions to more than ten or so people using the traditional methods of slander, speech.
I've omitted both the name of the guilty and well the guilty (the aggressor and the offender) in this article, because frankly the process of 'misdemeanor followed by bollocking' is not a new one. It's old, very old. However, what it did make me realise was how easily someone can be socially isolated by the use of social media. Now personally I don't think that was what it was meant for. In truth I don't think either the offender or the aggressor this week appreciated how detrimental Facebook could be. But that's the problem. As Facebook users, we are encouraged to say what's on our minds, for better and for worse. As the use of social media becomes a more prominent part of our life style, as indeed it has over the past five or so years, I have absolutely no doubt that these type of incidents will become more frequent. There's a massive difference between online banter and online abuse; notably tone and context, which are easily misinterpreted.
Looking beyond the case above, posting abusive or inappropriate messages on Facebook can have far-reaching consequences. Posting an insult may seem harmless or even funny at the time, but you only have to look at sites such as Failbook or Lamebook to realise how horribly devastating they can be. I have family members on Facebook and a throw away comment from 'friends' could easily lead to a great deal of controversy. Just imagine, your old dear reading a post about a conquest from the previous night, left by a mate. Probably, she wouldn't be impressed and I dare say somewhat disappointed, all because of nothing more than a lack of thought from the poster. The misuses of social media are potentially endless but thankfully I think most people have the common sense to use them with at least a minimal degree of respect. However next time you post a throw away comment consider who could be reading, because not only does a derogatory comment leave a black mark on the recipient, but it also can say a lot about you too.
No comments:
Post a Comment